>wear a scarf at all times. this applies to the male gender as well. arrange it with flourish. note: this is the only item that is allowed to be a color other than black or gray.
>carry a bag at all times. again, this applies to both genders as well as children. purses, totes, satchels and baskets are all acceptable.
>take up as little space as possible when walking: hands in pockets, elbows in, feet together. learn to balance on cobblestones with heels together, practice at home.
>when seated, also take up as small a space as you can whilst still breathing. bags under your chair, legs crossed tightly, arms down, hands in lap.
>when walking, do not 'blink' as someone approaches directly in your path, it is much like playing "chicken", but you both turn your shoulders just a bit at the last minute and manage to pass each other by while keeping all feet involved on the four inches of sidewalk. do not stop in your path to 'let' someone "by" regardless of age, size, stroller, packages or trolley!
>smoke. always. everywhere. it is very important to smoke in restaurants, cafes, train stations and most importantly, when in the pharmacy.
>have a small dog with you. (the older you are, the smaller the dog: age 65=4 lb dog) the dog goes where you go. never, ever "pick up" after said dog. leashes are optional. a dog carried in your requisite bag is even better.
>also, in your bag, carry at least three packs of cigarettes for the day (but never a lighter or matches, that is what the tourists are for!), your daily baguette, a back up scarf, and the occasional roasted chicken.
>do not wear a watch. what do you care what time it is? you are French!